| Game time |
[Jul. 21st, 2009|01:34 pm] |
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A healthcare professional came to my home this morning on behalf of State Farm, who is providing life insurance to Jen and me (for an annual fee of $1200). She recorded my weight (167lb wearing shorts, thin shirt, no underwear), height (5'7" with air-sole turtle rubber sandals), took my blood pressure (92/60, which is lower for anyone at home vs a doctor's office) and blood and urine. In anticipation of her 9:30 visit, I ran 7.4 miles which lowered my blood pressure and weight, and made my urine dark, since I didn't want to add weight by rehydrating. If I have smoked pot or meth, or snorted cocaine or within 30 days, they will find out, and all three are equally risky behavior in their eyes. On my run, at the neck of a culdesac, I saw a samurai come out of his house with two dogs, and when I ran back out of the neck I smelled pungent dog shit. |
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| Maybe you can see our camera sometime |
[Apr. 30th, 2009|06:58 pm] |
What up Crackers!
Jen and I bought one of these Flip cameras:
http://www.theflip.com/products.shtml
I think it was the MINO HD because that sounds like the price we paid. I'm pretty sure that MINO vs Ultra = customized case vs blank case. We got a fancy orange embedded graphics case. We're pretty sure that FLiP outsources their custom graphics operation to Cafe Press, bc the box in which our fucking camera arrived said "Cafe Press" on it.
We also bought a Soft Pouch. Jen likes the Soft Pouch, but I don't because it's too small yet the keyring adds bulk and the camera comes with a sunglasses drawstring pouch anyway. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 9th, 2008|12:49 pm] |
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I had to do two things today while Jen is out of town: Get the broken mirror replaced and clean the gutters. Every place that Google says fixes mirrors in Raleigh is either closed on Saturday or doesn't fix mirrors. The best any business would promise is to come to my house sometime next week and fix it for $75. I called Jen and she is okay with us going to look for a new mirror to buy. Then I called Ricky, the guy who painted our house, and he'll come clean our gutters next week for $20. I'd clean the gutters, but where they are clogged is at a glass roof and I don't have a 25-foot ladder. I'm relieved that I don't have to do it. The rest of my day should involve Mario Kart, Facebook, maybe going outside and watching the Panthers play the Colts. |
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| The Starbucks 616 |
[Jul. 21st, 2008|02:19 am] |
Starbucks is closing 616 stores across the USA. In March, there were 11,434 Starbuckses across the country. Not a single Starbucks is going to close in Raleigh (where I stay). There are sixteen closing in Las Vegas. I don't buy coffee from Starbucks. I like to brew coffee at home where I can drink it before having to get dressed and drive somewhere. By the time I'm in the car, I'm already awake. Starbucks is like a restaurant that sells cereal. I'm glad if you them but I didn't understand their popularity.
The reason for the closures: "growing economic uncertainty." What does that mean? "These stores in the red won't ever turn a profit anytime soon because of, ah..." I'm not certain! The economy must be bad. I'm doing alright, so I can't really empathize. Batman was pretty good. |
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| Movie quiz |
[Jul. 18th, 2008|06:16 pm] |
1. What movie have you seen the most times in the theater? How many times?
Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring (the first one), Seven or so. At the time, it was just so fun to get high and watch that movie. A year later and I was falling asleep during the second one.
2. What was the last movie you walked out of in the theater?
Fun with Dick and Jane. Technically, that doesn't count because I arrived at the theater to see King Kong an hour early due to a web site misprint. In college, my brother and I walked out of Johnny Mnemonic because it sucked to see Die Hard 3 again. In junior high, my mom, brother and I walked out of School Daze which made her/us uncomfortable and into The Presidio which sucked and it was a two-screen theater so we went home.
3. What is the first movie you remember seeing in a theater?
I think it was The Aristocats.
4. What is your favorite movie soundtrack?
Last of the Mohicans, Buckaroo Banzai, Sunshine, CQ, Clockwork Orange, Pulp Fiction, Rushmore
5. Have you ever dressed up as a movie character for Halloween? If so, who?
Spongebob had a movie, but I bet that doesn't count.
6. What was the first R-rated movie you ever saw? Were you allowed or did you sneak?
The first movie that freaked me out was when I saw Dead of Winter at home on HBO when I wasn't supposed to.
7. Star Wars (orig. trilogy) or Lord of the Rings?
Star Wars wins on nostalgia, originality and Han & Leia.
8. Pacino or De Niro?
Seriously? Pacino isn't even an actor.
9. Titanic...did it suck or was it great?
I thought it sucked wet ass after I saw it in the theater. I watched part of it on TV a year ago and am now more understanding of its enormous success.
10. What's your take on Cassavetes?
I'm ashamed to say that I've seen 3 Nick Cassavettes movies and none of his father's.
11. Favorite John Hughes character?
Uncle Motherfuckin Buck
12. What movie gives you a boner (or makes you tingle)?
Alfonso Cuarón movies
13. What movie always makes you cry like the big puss you are?
What's Eating Gilbert Grape
14. What's the furthest you've ever gotten in a movie theater? (i.e, second base...)
A stripper promised to give me a blow job in a movie theater. And I would play with myself at the dollar theater in high school.
15. Speaking of sports metaphors, what's your favorite sports movie?
Rocky
16. Favorite
(a)... teen movie?
Back to the Future
(b)...Quentin Tarantino movie?
Pulp Fiction
(c)...Bill Murray movie?
Ghostbusters, Stripes and dont forget Quick Change
(d)...romantic comedy?
i'll say Next Stop Wonderland because it is under the radar
(e)...gangster movie?
Casino
(f)...horror movie?
Devil's Rejects
(g)...made for TV movie?
Shit, Night of the Scarecrow? or the Blache Taylor Moore movie
(h)...director?
John Waters
(i)...drug movie?
Fear and Loathing
17. What movie have you seen already but will never, ever, ever watch again?
Wedding Crashers, not that it's bad but I feel like I've memorized it, no wait I remember now: Transformers
18. What movie are you embarrassed to really like?
A Perfect Storm was on tv recently and I thought it wasn't bad
19. What movie should be remade asap?
The Watchmen
20. What the F happened to (insert answer)? He used to be so damn funny!
Jim Carrey
21. For the love of everything that's sacred, please someone stop (insert answer) from making another movie!
Everyone will say Michael Bay and I'll agree
22. What movie do all your friends love but you think is whatevs?
For some reason, everbody liked Something About Mary better than I did.
23. What movie do you love but all your friends think is whatevs?
Little Nicky
24. If you could hump/date/marry any movie character, who would it be?
Drew Barrymore in anything or Princess Leia
25. Best movie ever?
Ferris Bueller's Day Off
26. Book you wish would be made into a movie, and who would direct it?
Another Day in Paradise, Spike Lee |
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| The Brewery Tourery |
[Jul. 12th, 2008|06:46 pm] |
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Did you know that Big Boss Brewing Company is in Raleigh, NC? Well, it is! And if you show up there on a hot Saturday afternoon, you can get two free beers! And they'll even explain how the beers are brewt and the differences between yeasts and filters and before you know it you'll be inebriated and buying tshirts. I bought a tshirt. You can also show up on a cold Saturday but why wait. |
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| Movie Reviews |
[Jul. 10th, 2008|12:38 pm] |
In case you were wondering what I think about some movies that have come out on DVD in the past year:
Lars and the Real Girl
It's good. And sweet and not a one-note pony.
Black Snake Moan
Not so good. In fact, it is crapola, pretty much.
Get Smart
This isn't on DVD yet, but it's not worth seeing in the theater, if at all.
I guess that's all I got for now. |
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| How to Tube the Dan River |
[Jun. 23rd, 2008|08:50 pm] |
On Sunday, Jen and I went tubing on the Dan River through a company called Dan River Adventures. It was our first tubing adventure, after hearing many stories about tubing's funness for years. The way tubing works is, you sit in an innertube and travel five miles in three hours. The water is ankle deep on average, but sometimes gets waist deep, neck deep if you are dwarf or an amputee.
The thing to do as you go down the river, which is probably 70 degrees, is drink a lot of beer and try not to splash urine on your innertube as you inevitably urinate. There are three sitting poses you can try. The first one is called Ass in the Water, and it's what will probably be most natural to you. When your stomach gets tired of making you sit up, you can dunk your head in the water. The second pose is Superman - you're on your stomach. And the third pose is Yogi.
Besides drinking, you can talk about important things at length that you don't normally have three hours of uninterrupted silence to verbally ruminate over. You may talk over inane things if you prefer, although smoking pot in addition to drinking beer may be a prerequisite.
In case you didn't know, you arrive at the business location, in our case a house with a customized side part, then meet up with other cool kids and/or rednecks and get on a van and drive upstream. When you end up downstream, the van will drive you back. The cool kids are enjoyable to hang out with and it's truly comforting to be able to discuss Egg Drops, Beer O'Clock and Girl Talk with people whom you've just met. The rednecks, if you get stuck in a bunch of them, don't have a sense of personal embarrassment and may say things to the teenage van driver about Second Base or being tired of seeing Mexicans everywhere. I don't know what advice to offer, except to ask them pleasantly if they are drunk and to ignore their littering.
When you get back to your car, make sure that it isn't touching an electrified cow fence, because, if it is, you'll get a jolt that goes from your shoulders to your ankles, like you have just fallen asleep on the couch for a split-second. Because you've been drinking and floating for four hours, you will probably think that you're just getting your shit together in an awkward way, and get shocked twice more before one of the Cool Kids points out the situation. Then you'll go home and eat too-salty pasta primavera in McLeansville.
And that's how it's done! |
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